There is a rhythm that flows through the Meadows. The mornings and afternoons are carefully planned to suit the moods and strengths of each day. The schedule is relaxed. After all, as Amy points out, this is the residents’ home. They should be made comfortable, not regimented.

There are usually many more women than men in the Meadows. Why the preponderance of women? I can only guess. Maybe because women live longer than men. Maybe because a husband is cared for at home by his wife so he never moves to the Meadows.

Some residents have lived in the Meadows for years. If residents require a higher level of care, they return to the main building and go into Skilled Nursing. If they do not need that level of care, they remain in the Meadows until they reach the end of their lives.

Walking into Amy’s office is an amazing sight. Every inch of space is covered with stuff. The place is crammed with papers and books, arts and craft supplies, and event paraphernalia. Amy makes use of a giant computer to find material to plan each month ahead of time. She has lists of activities and source material helpful for group activities and individual needs. She is a master of research, which makes each day different and appealing to all.

The nurse’s room is for the medical staff. A myriad of CNAs assists with the residents’ everyday care. These magical people are always cheerful and helpful. They escort residents, help Amy with the events of the day, and provide hugs whenever needed. It takes a special kind of person to devote entire days to this kind of work. The CNAs and nurses are all women, except for at night when there is a male nurse on duty.

The door from the building’s lobby to the actual residents’ area is always locked. Visitors must sign in and out. The receptionist is the keeper of the locks, buzzing people in and out whenever needed. During this COVID pandemic, everyone has their temperature taken before being admitted into the residential area.

The lobby opens into the Sun Room, where group activities are held. There are a couple of tables off to one side where puzzles and arts and craft supplies are always available. This space allows the residents to keep busy, even if there is another activity going on. The other common spaces include living rooms with large TVs and small libraries with an assortment of books. 

As you walk in, on the right, there is a flip chart displaying the date and outlining the activities for the day. Some of the residents use this to pick and choose what they want to do. Starting at 10:00 AM and ending at 6:15 PM, you can see the variety of choices for the day. There is something arranged at half hour intervals with a variety that is very impressive indeed. No one has the time to be bored. The residents do not always consult the agenda. They are led around by Amy and her trusted band of helpers.

Mornings are a time to wake up. Get the juices flowing. Breakfast is served from 7:30 to 8:30, but there is a looseness about the schedule. Some residents wake early, some late. If anyone oversleeps, their food is kept warm until they are ready for it. There is a hearty meal to start the day. A full breakfast with juice, eggs, bacon and sausages. 

I visited the Meadows during the week before the three-day July 4th weekend. I was there to observe the morning activity on June 29. I arrived at 10:00 and stayed until lunch time. The first planned activity for that day was a “Coffee and Chat” in the Sun Room. That included a choice of coffee, tea, or hot chocolate. In the Sun Room, chairs were set up in a semi-circle to encourage resident participation. Amy sat in the middle so everyone could see and hear her. Behind her was the lovely garden. Before the activity began, the door to the garden was left open and the residents went in and out at will.

Each day, the residents’ memories were challenged. What day of the week was this? What month comes after June? What was the weather like? After that warm-up, Amy brought everyone in from the garden. 

Morning activities are in the Sun Room. Mobile residents walked in and out. CNAs escorted less capable folks. Some chose not to participate. When I was there, about 20 people came and sat down for the start of the day. That Wednesday was very lively with conversations among some of the residents. Some were talking. Some were singing. Amy tried to attract everyone’s attention. The CNAs served the drinks while Amy talked. Occasionally, a resident would add something. They were recognized and encouraged to participate.

Every day, there is some kind of exercise. At 10:30 on the day I was there, it was chair exercises designed to build and maintain muscle strength. The workout ranged from arms and legs, fingers and toes, to neck and shoulders. As they did the exercises, they counted the rhythm of each movement. First, they did an exercise, like stretching with hands over their heads, or raising and lowering their legs. They did each one at a normal speed and then did the same one in double-time. Amy led them on this simple workout and almost everyone responded. On special occasions there might be a different kind of exercise, but there was always body movement at some time each day.

After exercises, because of the holiday to come, a patriotic song was in order. The Sun Room has Alexa, an electronic speaking device that answers questions and requests. The user need only ask a question, and the machine comes back with an answer. Amy asked Alexa to play Kate Smith singing “God Bless America.” Alexa and Amy led the group to join in. I was amazed to see how many people remembered the song even though they could not remember much else.

The next activity was the thought for the day. Amy prompted the group with the phrase “I am grateful for…” The answers came slowly. 

“…a sunny day”

“…Tara and Amy.”

“…I can walk.”

“…singing.”

There was gratitude for the sunshine, the sky, and clean air.

Next came “fill in the blanks.” Amy read famous poetry, leaving out the end of each sentence. The residents supplied the rest. They got them all!

At 11:00 Amy left the group and one of the CNAs took over. There is a publication called “The Daily Chronicle.” It includes the day’s quote and a list of important things that happened on that day. That Wednesday, it was a quote from William Mayo, founder of the Mayo Clinic along with a short bio of the man. The residents had copies and those who could, read along.

The major historical event of that day was the publication of Gone with the Wind. We read interesting facts about the book, the movie, and the author. While this was going on, there were people engaged in activities at the tables in the rear. Next came another “Fill in the Blanks.” This time it was a couple’s names. Like Mickey and Minnie Mouse.

It was 11:30 and time for lunch. There are three dining rooms at the Meadows. One for those who live in the west wing, and two for the residents who live in the east wing. Residents were escorted to their proper dining room. I left for the day.

On Friday, I returned to attend the afternoon events. Since July 4th fell on the following Monday, and most of the staff had the day off, the holiday was celebrated on Friday. In order to give the day some special meaning, Friday had a theme. That day, it was “Luau Day.” The room was decorated with streamers. The residents had paper leis, paper flowers, and for those who wished it, paper hula skirts.

The morning exercise that day was hula dancing. I wasn’t there to witness it, but I was assured that the residents had a really good time. After lunch, the skirts were collected and tucked away for another occasion some other day.

At 1:00, the residents were finished with lunch and returned to the Sun Room, chatting with the CNAs all the time. They waited patiently for the next activity to begin. Some came to participate. Others fell asleep.

At 1:30, Deacon Doug arrived to lead the group in songs. The ukulele was part of the luau atmosphere but the songs were mostly patriotic to celebrate July 4th. Doug is a friendly, jovial man. He comes twice a month to lead group singing. He led the group in the Sun Room where the chairs were all arranged in theater-like rows. The deacon brought song sheets that he handed out. He was the conductor. The residents were his chorus. As Doug led the group, he told little anecdotes with appropriate stories describing what each song was about. 

About 20 people came. The sing-along began with “God Bless America” and ended with songs giving tribute to our military. For the Army there was “The Caissons Go Rolling Along.” For the Navy there was “Anchors Aweigh.” For the Marines, they sang “From the Halls of Montezuma.” I was disappointed that there was nothing for the Air Force. For the final song, Doug chose “He’s Got the Whole World in His Hand.” In between there were popular songs and folk songs. High on the list were “This Land is Your Land,” “Yankee Doodle,” and “You Are My Sunshine.” Many voices joined in. The Sun Room rang with music. 

When Doug left it was snack time with a choice of cake or ambrosia, a concoction of oranges and shredded coconut. Then it was 3:00 and I left.

This is just a sample of some typical days at the Meadows. Reading the summer months’ calendars provides a breath-taking view of all the activities designed to interest and stimulate the residents. 

Some days are special. There may be a theme for the day. Most of the events include activities and treats that revolve around the theme itself. I already mentioned the special Hawaiian “Luau Day.” There are other special theme days. In June there was “Travel to Germany,” the Reiki Circle, the first day of summer, and, of course, Father’s Day. July brought Independence Day, Blue Monday, the MBL All Star Game Day, and Frankfurter Friday. In August, there was Melon Monday, “Celebrate Puerto Rico day,” and “Taste of the Season”—just a short sample of events chosen to combat boredom and stimulate memory for everyone in the room. 

Morning activities begin at 10:30. On some mornings, the first event is the Coffee Chat at 10:00. This is the time for residents to chat with each other and sip some coffee while the Sun Room is being set up for the day. 

Most mornings include some form of exercise and hydration. There is the exercise circle, “Let’s Rock Around the Clock,” the morning stretch, and exercises set to music.

Tuesday mornings begin with “Haven, Prayer, and Praise” presented by Seabury’s chaplain. 

Every morning ends with reading from “The Daily Chronicle.” Then it’s time for lunch. After lunch, if the weather is good, there may be a stroll outside for the “Sunshine Steppers.” On days that are too cold or too hot, too cloudy or, according to the weather man, rain, snow or sleet is expected, a walk inside will fill the bill for some exercise.

The afternoon activities are more diverse than the morning ones. Events include courtyard strolls, sing-alongs, Chair Yoga, table bowling and shuffleboard. There is a variety of things to do at the activity tables in the back of the room. Puzzles, word search, dominoes, board games, Jenga, conversation balls and card games, with an of assortment of different kinds of arts and crafts. Everyone is busy. 

Special events are scattered throughout the month. There is music therapy with Maggie who hands out a variety of percussion instruments. She uses a large bongo drum to play a pattern of rhythms which the residents duplicate on the instruments they have. The first patterns are simple. One or two thumps and that’s enough. Then the patterns become more complex. The residents follow along. I was amazed to see how well this activity progressed.

 I already described the sing-alongs with Deacon Doug. There are other sing-alongs throughout the month. Sometimes they are led by the staff or visitors. Sometimes they are led by Alexa, the electronic friend. Music is always welcome. More residents participate in this than in anything else offered.

Throughout the month, there are movies shown in the dark room adjacent to the Sun Room. Some are shown in the afternoons. Others are shown after dinner. These are usually light hearted films designed to make one smile. In just one month there was “Steel Magnolias,” “Tootsie,” “Old Yeller,” “State Fair,” “Out of Africa,” and “Walk the Line.” Not to mention “South Pacific,” “Meet Me in St. Louis,” “Singin’ in the Rain,” and a documentary on Franklin Delano Roosevelt. There are at least a dozen movies scheduled during a month, quite a few of them are after dinner.

Of course, there is the monthly Birthday Party. All residents who have birthdays during the month are singled out for good cheer and best wishes. The air is festive. After some entertainment, there are birthday cupcakes for everyone.

On one occasion, the birthday party was held on a day scheduled for poetry so I happened to be there to join in the festivities. A musician arrived and serenaded the group as he strummed his guitar. A few residents got up and danced. One dancer was a spritely old lady who could really “cut a rug.” She turned to me and invited me to dance. “I can’t dance,” I told her. As if I hadn’t said anything, she took me around the waist and tried to waltz me around the floor. Waltz of all things! That is the dreadful rhythm in 3/4 time when people have only two feet.

When I started to stumble, she drew herself up to her tiny self and said, “You can’t dance.” Then she turned and grabbed the CNA who was laughing on the sidelines. The two danced happily off, like lovers dancing into the sunset.

Toward the end of each month there is the “Resident Council Meeting.” That surprised me. The event is actually run by Amy, even though it is really a residents’ meeting. The minutes of the last meeting are read. Each time three resident rights are enumerated, and the three different departments get feedback on how they are doing. Then the next month’s calendar is read.

Each meeting has minutes typed up and kept in a book in the recreation office. The residents are asked if they have any problems that need to be solved.

This is a very exciting idea. I was truly sorry that I didn’t get a chance to attend at least one of these meetings.

Once a month there is a visit from Brian, an artist who leads the painting class. The class meets in a large room in the rear of the building. Brian carries canvases and paints with him. The residents’ paintings are in different stages so there may be some people who are completing an old painting while others are already working on the next one. I saw one woman get up and storm out because she insisted that the painting she was given was not hers. Nobody seemed perturbed by her demonstration

Once or twice a month there is a visit from Zoey, the dog. This is a great pick-me-up. In the late fall, there is a visit from a llama who lives in the neighborhood.

I am not an authority in treating dementia residents. This book is based on my own experience. I loved writing poetry with my new friends and I love visiting with them whenever I can. This project has been a wonderful learning experience for me. I know now, that the best I can do for these residents, is to make them happy, to let them enjoy life, and to find pleasure wherever they can.